How
to reach an orgasm at the same time as your partner is a question I get asked a
lot. Well, there is no hard and fast rule that you need to orgasm at the same
time as your partner.
But,
you cannot deny that the concept has been romanticized in movies, books and
more. We have all watched hunky actors in regular movies and even in porn films
grunting, groaning and moaning at the same time his woman scratches his back in
wanton abandon, as she scales the heights of sexual pleasure. Now,
can you honestly tell me that you have never wanted to do that to your partner?
There's
no shame if you have -- after all, the sex drives is the strongest drive we
have, even stronger than the drive for self-preservation if you look how
recklessly men and women behave in their need to scratch the sexual itch.
The problem with simultaneous orgasms
It's
a well known fact women need a lot more persuasion to reach the big O than men,
who really just have to do a bit of pushing and pulling (OK, I am talking from
a woman's perspective here... but ask any man and he'll tell you I'm right. In
fact, the elusive "O" is known to give a serious bout of anxiety to
most men as they fret over their partner faking it).
So,
between a hard erection that has turned your brain to mush and the woman who lies
needily below you, how do you attain this seemingly unachievable state?
The answer lies in the physiology of
orgasms
It's
really simple; you will need to prepare your woman better. This is where those
foreplay 101 classes will come to your rescue. You need to get your lady all
soppy wet and crazy with sexual desire before you enter her. As a matter of fact, the
right time for actual penetration is when she is just about ready to beg you
for it.
Give those fingers and tongue a
workout
Till
then, explore her body with your tongue, licking and biting every one of her
erogenous zones.
Don't
leave out the neck, the breast, and the nipples while slowly creating a wet
trail to her navel. Linger here for a while because you want the anticipation
to build. You don't want her to cum... but to keep her on the brink of
unattained gratification. Tease her clitoris and labia by blowing on it before you
touch them with your mouth.
Lick
every part of her down there before you suck on her clitoris. It would be a
good time to get some finger action going. Just use one or two fingers,
remember you don't want her to cum yet.
Stop
every few minutes to observe her reactions, her face, expressions and how
tightly she is clutching on to the bed sheet or the pillow should tell you
everything you need to know. Just when she starts to push your head down to her
pussy, stop for about a minute and ask her if she wants more of it.
By
the time you are at round three of the act, she will be yearning to feel your
hard erection penis pumping into her. This would be a good time to take her hard but try
to exercise control over your own urge to orgasm.
Let
go only when you feel her muscles clenching around your penis; most women will
inadvertently close their eyes at this point and even the most silent lover
will inevitably moan.
And,
that should be your cue to fill her up. If holding on to your ejaculation is an
issue, try the Kegel exercise. Oh yeah, that one works for men too.
